Results may vary. Mine always do. The fine-print disclaimer, repurposed as a life philosophy. A faux-legal setup followed by an honest gut-punch — for anyone whose plans, diets, and New Year's resolutions have never once gone as expected. A clever, funny addition to a home office, kitchen, or anywhere you need a laugh at your own expense.

Part of the Bright Zebra Creative Humor collection — for the desk, the shelf, or anywhere you want a daily reminder not to take it all so seriously.

Our premium matte paper is heavier-weight, white, and features a smooth, uncoated finish that feels luxuriously soft to the touch:

• Paper Finishing: Matte, smooth, non-reflective surface.
• Paper Weight: 200 gsm (80 lb), thickness: 0.26 mm (10.3 mils).
• Sustainable Paper: FSC-certified or equivalent paper for sustainability.

Learn about paper types and their unique textures and finishes here.

No minimum orders, printed and shipped on demand.